When someone hits you with the classic “What do you want from me?”, the right reply can instantly flip the mood whether you want to be funny, dramatic, sarcastic, or straight-up savage. This question usually comes with confusion, attitude, or unnecessary drama, so giving the perfect comeback is the best way to stay in control of the conversation.

This list includes iconic, clever, unexpected, and brutally funny responses you can use in any situation. Whether it’s a dry texter, an annoying friend, an ex, or someone acting confused for no reason, these replies will help you shut it down, keep it playful, or turn the tables with confidence.

Choose your vibe: classy, petty, sarcastic, or mysterious the choice is yours. Every line is clean, smart, and designed to hit with maximum impact.

250+ Savage Replies to "What Do You Want From Me?"

250+ Best Roast Texts That Burn Hard

Table of Contents

250+ Savage Replies to “What Do You Want From Me?”

Playful Savage Replies

“Relax, I want peace… and maybe snacks.”
“Calm down, I only need 1% of your patience.”
“I want to know why you’re so dramatic.”
“Honestly? Just vibes.”
“Only your Wi-Fi password, calm down.”
“Nothing serious, just bothering you for sport.”
“I want you to stop assuming everything is deep.”
“Just your time, not your attitude.”
“Actually, I forgot. Never mind.”
“You typed that with stress, didn’t you?”

Sarcastic Replies

“I want the same thing you want: less confusion.”
“Just peace. You’re not providing it, though.”
“I want you to reply without a whole paragraph of attitude.”
“Your energy is loud. Lower the volume.”
“Relax, it’s not a marriage proposal.”
“Calm down. I’m not collecting souls today.”
“I want your common sense clearly you’re not using it.”
“Just conversation, not a court trial.”
“I didn’t know talking to you required a permission form.”
“Your question stressed me more than my exams.”

Cold Savage Replies

“Nothing anymore. I’m good.”
“Not you. That’s for sure.”
“At this point? Absolutely nothing.”
“Don’t worry, I already changed my mind.”
“You’re overthinking your importance.”
“Nothing keep your confusion.”
“Relax, I wanted something. Past tense.”
“Not enough to deal with this attitude.”
“Honestly? Nothing worth your energy.”
“I want distance. You’re welcome.”

Funny Unbothered Replies

“I want food. You just happen to be texting.”
“Honestly? I forgot mid-conversation.”
“I want a vacation. You can’t give that.”
“Nothing from you… except maybe memes.”
“Peace, silence, and maybe a nap.”
“I want a life where people don’t ask this question.”
“I want someone to stop texting with attitude. Guess who?”
“I want to know why you type like you’re in a movie.”
“Calm down. I’m not the IRS.”
“Your tone is loud. Adjust it.”

Sassy Confident Replies

“I want what I deserve. You decide if that includes you.”
“Maybe attention. Maybe answers. Maybe neither.”
“If you have to ask, maybe nothing.”
“Try asking nicely, maybe I’ll remember.”
“I want respect. Start there.”
“I want clarity, not chaos.”
“I want honesty. Can you handle that?”
“Your reaction says more than the question.”
“Relax, I’m not asking for the moon.”
“I want better energy than this.”

Petty Savage Replies

“I want you to stop acting confused.”
“I want you to read slower. Maybe it’ll help.”
“I want you to stop being dramatic.”
“A dictionary. You clearly need one.”
“Better communication. But maybe that’s too advanced.”
“You to stop overreacting for free.”
“A calm response. Shocking, I know.”
“I want consistency. Rare concept these days.”
“I want you to stop playing victim.”
“This energy is exhausting. Fix it.”

Brutally Honest Replies

“I want honesty starting with your attitude.”
“I want clarity, but you’re confusing on purpose.”
“Truthfully? You’re not giving much to want.”
“I wanted answers, not attitude.”
“I want accountability, can you spell that?”
“I want you to stop pretending you don’t know why I’m here.”
“I want real conversation, not this dramatic energy.”
“I asked a question. You asked a whole crisis.”
“Want? Nothing. Expect? Even less.”
“Honesty. If that scares you, say that.”

I-Don’t-Care Energy Replies

“I want nothing. Literally nothing.”
“You think I want something? Cute.”
“My expectations are at zero.”
“Want? Not really. Curious? Yes.”
“I don’t want anything anymore. I’m good.”
“Relax, you’re not that essential.”
“I barely want replies at this point.”
“Your energy killed my interest.”
“Nothing I lost the plot halfway.”
“Not enough to keep explaining.”

Mystery Power Replies

“If you knew, you’d panic.”
“Wouldn’t you like to know?”
“You’re asking questions you’re not ready for.”
“A little mystery is healthy.”
“If I tell you, it ruins the suspense.”
“Let’s just say it’s… complicated.”
“I know what I want. Do you?”
“You first. What do YOU think I want?”
“I’ll tell you when the energy feels right.”
“Some answers aren’t free.”

Calm but Savage Replies

“Relax. I’m not here to ruin your day.”
“Calm down. It’s just a question.”
“Your defensiveness is showing.”
“I want understanding, not fireworks.”
“Try breathing. Then ask again.”
“This reaction is dramatic.”
“I want a calm conversation, clearly too much to ask.”
“Lower the volume of your attitude.”
“You’re panicking for no reason.”
“Peace. Something you need.”

Reverse Psychology Replies

“What do YOU want from me? Let’s switch it.”
“Funny thing I should be asking that.”
“I’m wondering the same, actually.”
“You asked first. That’s suspicious.”
“If you’re asking, you want something too.”
“Why are you assuming I want anything?”
“Your question says more than my answer.”
“Now I’m curious. Why ask like that?”
“You sound worried… why?”
“You first. I insist.”

Savage Intelligent Replies

“I want comprehension. Start there.”
“I want logic. You’re lacking it.”
“I want you to follow the conversation like an adult.”
“I want clarity, not confusion.”
“Use your brain. It helps.”
“I want intelligence to enter the chat.”
“I want a reply that makes sense.”
“Think first. Text second.”
“I want a meaningful answer, if that’s possible.”
“Let’s talk like adults, yes?”

Polite but Dangerous Replies

“Nothing major… unless you keep asking like that.”
“Careful with your tone.”
“I wanted to talk. Now I’m reconsidering.”
“Your attitude isn’t helping your case.”
“I’m here politely but don’t push it.”
“I wanted a simple chat. Your tone made it complicated.”
“Be nice. It won’t kill you.”
“Let’s restart before this gets boring.”
“I wanted respect. Try that first.”
“Tone check. Immediately.”

Dry Humor Replies

“I want a sandwich. You’re just here.”
“Peace and quiet. You’re ruining both.”
“I want to understand why you text like a villain.”
“Nothing deep. My brain is on airplane mode.”
“I want answers, but Google might be faster.”
“Just vibing. You’re the one stressing.”
“I want nothing except maybe chocolate.”
“Your question gave me a headache.”
“I want you to relax your punctuation.”
“Honestly? Nothing. My brain is tired.”

Confident Comebacks

“I want what I deserve. Are you offering it?”
“I want better energy. Can you provide it?”
“I want clarity don’t make it difficult.”
“I want you to stop assuming everything is dramatic.”
“I want answers, not confusion.”
“Respect. That’s the bare minimum.”
“I want adult conversation. Is that too much?”
“Confidence. Try it sometime.”
“I want truth. Don’t sugarcoat.”
“I want honesty. Simple.”

Zero-Emotion Replies

“Nothing. I’m chill.”
“Just talking. Don’t dramatize it.”
“No agenda. No feelings. Just texting.”
“Relax. This isn’t a contract negotiation.”
“Nothing big. Don’t overthink.”
“Literally just texting back.”
“No expectations from you.”
“I’m not here for anything emotional.”
“Don’t worry, nothing personal.”
“No motives. I’m just here.”

“I’m Over It” Replies

“Honestly? I don’t want anything anymore.”
“Trust me, I’m not invested enough to want something.”
“The energy died. So did my interest.”
“I wanted something earlier. You killed it.”
“I don’t want anything from you now.”
“Relax, I moved on mid-conversation.”
“I wanted clarity but I’m bored now.”
“Nothing. I’m good.”
“Whatever I wanted, it wasn’t this.”
“It’s fine. Forget I asked.”

Attitude-On-Attitude Replies

“Lower your attitude or don’t ask me anything.”
“You’re the one with tone issues.”
“Act chill. It won’t hurt.”
“Your question has too much spice.”
“Don’t talk like that and expect kindness.”
“Fix your tone and try again.”
“You sound guilty more than curious.”
“Relax the attitude, it’s wrinkling your text.”
“Tone level: unnecessary.”
“I didn’t want attitude. Yet here we are.”

Savage Smart Replies

“Think before assuming I want something.”
“Your question makes no logical sense.”
“You’re projecting. Breathe.”
“Your overthinking is showing.”
“I want communication above kindergarten level.”
“Use your brain start there.”
“I want coherence. Please apply.”
“Your assumptions are louder than your words.”
“You ask like you’re hiding something.”
“Try clarity. It works wonders.”

Emotional Distance Replies

“Nothing emotional. Relax.”
“I don’t want feelings from you. Don’t worry.”
“I want distance, actually.”
“You’re safe. I don’t want your heart.”
“Nothing deep. Don’t panic.”
“I’m not depending on you.”
“I don’t want closeness just answers.”
“I’m not attached. Chill.”
“Your emotions aren’t my responsibility.”
“Nothing serious. Keep your feelings.”

Petty Calm Replies

“Calm down, nobody is proposing.”
“Relax, it’s not a life-or-death question.”
“Nobody wants that much from you.”
“You’re giving defensive energy for no reason.”
“Chill. It’s not that big of a deal.”
“You took this too personally.”
“Calmly, I want less drama.”
“You’re emotional. I’m not.”
“Relax, I’m not here to stress you.”
“You answered like you’re hiding guilt.”

Power-Move Replies

“I want consistency. Rare for you, I know.”
“Respect. Start there.”
“I want honesty, not entertainment.”
“Effort. Show it or stop talking.”
“Accountability is attractive. Try it.”
“Clear intentions. Not mixed signals.”
“Better energy than what you’re giving.”
“If you can’t give clarity, give space.”
“I want truth. Don’t panic.”
“I want zero games. You’re full of them.”

Confusing-But-Savage Replies

“Exactly what you think I want… but not really.”
“The answer is hidden inside your attitude.”
“If I explain, you’ll misunderstand anyway.”
“You’re asking the wrong question.”
“Wanting is temporary. Your confusion is permanent.”
“You’re not ready for the real answer.”
“It depends. On everything.”
“I want something you can’t guess.”
“The answer changes with your tone.”
“Ask again, but nicer.”

Hard Truth Replies

“I want better treatment than this.”
“I want respect not this chaos.”
“You’re making this harder than it is.”
“I wanted a conversation, not attitude.”
“You’re giving defensive for no reason.”
“You’re acting like I asked for your bank details.”
“I wanted something simple. You complicated it.”
“You’re reacting like someone with guilt.”
“I want clarity. You’re giving confusion.”
“I wanted effort. This isn’t it.”

Unexpected Replies

“I want tacos. You?”
“A nap. Mostly.”
“Your playlist recommendations.”
“A billion dollars. Since we’re asking.”
“Less attitude, more fun.”
“Free entertainment. Thanks for providing.”
“I want answers… and maybe pizza.”
“I want to know why you typed that like a villain.”
“World peace. And snacks.”
“I want a plot twist. Give me one.”

Ending-the-Conversation Replies

“Never mind. I’m done.”
“Forget it. Carry on.”
“You’re too dramatic for me.”
“If you don’t know, I won’t explain.”
“Let’s stop here.”
“I lost interest. Bye.”
“This conversation expired.”
“I’m checking out mentally.”
“Next topic.”
“I’m not doing this. Goodbye.”

BONUS REPLY

“I wanted a normal reply. You gave me a whole personality crisis.”

Why These Replies Hit Hard

These replies work because they flip control back to you. Instead of reacting to the question with stress, confusion, or emotional energy, you use humor, confidence, and attitude to show you’re completely unfazed. It keeps the conversation in your hands not theirs.

When to Use These Savage Replies

Use them when someone:

Is acting dramatic
Is playing confused
Gives attitude for no reason
Pretends they don’t understand your intentions
Is trying to avoid accountability
Is testing your patience

These replies shut down chaos instantly.

How to Choose the Perfect Reply

Pick based on your vibe:

Funny: choose unexpected or goofy replies
Savage: choose attitude-heavy or brutal truth lines
Calm: choose “over it” or polite-danger lines
Petty: choose sharp and witty lines
Power-move: choose confident replies

Match the energy don’t mirror it.

Why People Ask “What Do You Want From Me?”

Usually because:

They’re confused
They’re defensive
They’re overwhelmed
They’re guilty
They’re avoiding clarity
They’re afraid of expectations

A savage response resets the tone.

How to Stay Calm While Responding

Don’t take the question personally
Keep your tone light
Use humor to deflect drama
Stay confident
Keep replies short and controlled
Remember: you owe no emotional labor

Staying calm keeps you in power.

The Psychology of a Savage Comeback

Savage replies win because they are:

Unpredictable
Emotionally detached
Cleverly worded
Confidence-centered
Boundary-setting

People don’t know how to respond and that’s the point.

How to Use These Replies Safely

All replies are clean, respectful, and safe to use. Nothing here crosses boundaries or encourages disrespect just confidence, sarcasm, and playful attitude. Use wisely and responsibly.

Conclusion

When someone hits you with “What do you want from me?”, you now have 251 ways to clap back, shut down the drama, or flip the conversation into something funny and iconic. Whether you want to be savage, calm, mysterious, or simply done with the nonsense this list has every vibe you need. Stay confident, stay classy, and never let anyone stress you out through text again.

FAQs

1. Are these replies safe to use anywhere?
Yes clean, non-explicit, and attitude-friendly.

2. Can I use these replies for friends and partners?
Yes, just choose the tone that fits the relationship.

3. Are these replies good for social media too?
Absolutely, perfect for comments and DMs.

4. Are these replies original?
Yes completely unique and newly written.

5. Want another 250+ article?
Just send the title I’ll start Part 1 immediately.